MEOWNEYBRANCH 001 · WINDOW 1
X

EST. TUESDAY · TELLER: HIM · EXACT CHANGE ONLY

MEOWNEY

$MEOWNEY

Meowney is a cat who climbed into a money bag, got stuck, and now works the window at a bank. He counts money all day. None of it is his.

i went in for the smell of the paper and the bag shut behind me. by the time anybody noticed, the branch had already stencilled my name on the glass and printed a little plate for the counter, and correcting them at that point would have been rude.

so i count. sixes, twenty sevens, one hundred and ninety nines. i push them under the glass and i watch them walk out the door with somebody else. the two twenties standing up in my collar have been there since the first morning and they are not mine either — i checked twice, then i checked again.

COUNT HIS MONEY BUY $MEOWNEY X / TWITTER
CONTRACT not live yet
poke him · he pays
a cat wearing a money bag he cannot take off, two twenties standing up in the collar, both of them somebody else's OPEN WINDOW 1 ↓8 CUSTOMERS WAITING

THE WINDOW

MAKE THE AMOUNT EXACTLY · NO ROUNDING · HE WILL WAIT

SERVED0 / 8
MISCOUNTS0
PUSHED UNDER THE GLASS$0
KEPT FOR HIMSELF$0.00
the teller, still in the bag, waiting for the correct amount

↑ PUSH BILLS THROUGH HERE

MEOWNEY · TELLER · WINDOW 1

CUSTOMER 01 · WALK-IN

…

WANTS EXACTLY$0

THE DRAWER — CLICK A BILL TO PUT IT IN THE TRAY

IN THE TRAY$0

click a bill in the tray to take it back out

DAY SHEET — WINDOW 1

09:00 — branch open. he is already at the window. he was there before the lights.

THE DRAWER

ONE THING TURNS UP FOR EVERY CUSTOMER HE GETS RIGHT

FIELD NOTES

WEEK 1 · STILL IN THE BAG

the face of a cat who has counted forty thousand dollars this week and touched none of it

NOTE 01 · 09:14

THE FACE

this is the face of somebody who has counted forty one thousand dollars since monday and gone home with the same nothing. i am not sad about it. i just have the eyes for it now, and the eyes do not switch off at the end of a shift.

two twenties standing up in the collar of the bag, unclaimed, untouched, not his

NOTE 02 · 11:40

THE TWO TWENTIES

they were in the collar when the bag closed. i have filed them as found property four times and the form comes back saying the property is not lost. so they stay up there, forty dollars of somebody else, riding around on my neck all day.

the dollar sign printed on the bag, which is a uniform and not a personal statement

NOTE 03 · 16:55

THE UNIFORM

people see the sign on my front and assume it is a boast. it is a uniform. the branch prints it on everything that holds money, including me, and nobody printed anything on the inside where i actually live.

THE FINE PRINT

READ IT AT THE WINDOW · HE WILL NOT READ IT FOR YOU

1,000,000,000SUPPLY
one billion, counted once, by hand, by him. he did it in a single sitting because he did not trust a machine to be honest about the last thousand. the count took nine hours and he has not offered to do it again.
BURNEDLIQUIDITY
locked and the key posted into the slot on his own counter, which is the one slot in the building that only goes one way. he watched it drop, wrote the time on a slip, and put the slip in the drawer with everything else nobody is coming back for.
0 / 0TAX
nothing on the way in and nothing on the way out. he has been on the other side of a window that takes a cut all week and he did not enjoy the view from there, so he did not build one here.
RENOUNCEDOWNERSHIP
he signed it away with the same pen he uses for withdrawal slips and then put the pen back in the cup, because the pen belongs to the branch as well. the bag is the only thing here that is still legally attached to him, and only because it will not come off.

END OF SHIFT · WINDOW 1

DRAWER BALANCED

eight customers, eight correct amounts, drawer down to the cent. the branch says nothing when it balances, which is how you know it balanced.

PUSHED UNDER: $0
MISCOUNTS: 0
KEPT: $0.00